The Plan, or: How I Ended Up Booking Passage on a Container Ship

As it happens, I have found myself with a little time on my hands. Some time, in fact, the circumstances of which I am not going to bore anyone with here. The time has been given. I have chosen to spend it extravagantly.

In early July, I made the mistake of asking myself the honest question: what would I actually do with some uninterrupted time? The correct answer, per every article ever written on the subject, is to learn Italian and buy a road bike. I am not, however, fond of the idea of being seen in lycra in public, and the road bike quietly removed itself from the shortlist. I did, briefly, consider a sports car. That lasted approximately one afternoon and one honest look in a mirror. The answer I arrived at, at 11pm, in front of a spreadsheet, was to circumnavigate the world by container ship.

Why a container ship

• No WiFi worth mentioning.
• No small talk that isn't about weather.
• No one, absolutely no one, can email me a "quick question."
• Meals are provided, on a schedule, by a person named Elena who does not negotiate.

I ran the numbers. The route runs Savannah → Rotterdam → Suez → Singapore → Shanghai → Busan → Long Beach → Panama → home. About twenty six weeks. One passenger cabin. A great deal of ocean.

What I am bringing

One duffel. One MacBook. Three books I have been lying about reading for years. No phone charger for the phone I no longer wish to have. My passport, which has just enough pages left to be interesting.

What I am telling people

Something plausible. Something they will not, in fairness, feel able to fact check. I am, apparently, "consulting on maritime logistics." This is technically true if you accept a very broad reading of the word consulting.

I leave for Savannah on Monday, 6 July. The ship sails Friday on the tide. I will post from the road.